Original book titles discovered!
A diligent researcher has recently unearthed some original working titles for books that were later published under more familiar titles. This person, who has chosen to remain anonymous, revealed only that he or she was inspired by an episode of Seinfeld. Here is the exact passage quoted in the introduction to the list of titles:
Jerry: Hey, you know what? I read the most unbelievable thing about Tolstoy the other day. Did you know the original title for War and Peace was War—What Is It Good For?
Elaine: Ha ha.
Jerry: No, no.. I'm not kidding, Elaine, it's true. His mistress didn't like the title and insisted he change it to War and Peace.
The researcher divided the list into several categories, including regional publications (of which only the Hawaii regional titles are reprinted here).
Hawaii Titles:
Lee Cataluna, Folks You Meet in Longs --- original title: Folks You Meet in a Popular Local Drug Store That’s Not Walmart
Lisa Linn Kanai, Islands Linked by Ocean --- You’ve Got These Islands, and This Ocean, and They’re Like Connected
Lois Ann Yamanaka, Heads by Harry --- Harry’s Heads (Not Human)
Michelle Cruz Skinner, In the Company of Strangers --- Hanging Out With Unfamiliar Folks
Lee Tonouchi, Da Word --- The Meaningful Unit of Language
Darrell Lum, Pass On, No Pass Back! --- Harry Potter and the Beer Can Hat and other Stories
English Classics:
Henry Fielding, Tom Jones --- Bad Boys and the Women Who Love Them
Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice --- Pride—What Is It Good For?
Emily Bronte, Wuthering Heights --- Heathcliff and Cathy and Lots of Severe Weather
Charles Dickens, A Tale of Two Cities --- A Guide to London and Paris: Things to Avoid
Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland --- I Swear I Wasn't Smoking Anything When I Wrote This
Graham Greene, The Power and the Glory --- The Power—What Is It Good For?
George Orwell, 1984 --- A Guide to the Future: Things to Avoid
J. R. R. Tolkien, The Lord of the Rings --- Epic Adventures in a World That Looks a Lot Like New Zealand
American Classics:
Nathaniel Hawthorne, The Scarlet Letter --- Making A
Henry David Thoreau, Walden --- Two Years in the Woods but Very Close to Town
Herman Melville, Moby Dick --- The Sea Captain Who Can’t Just Let Bygones Be Bygones
Mark Twain, The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn --- The Runaway Boy Who Talks Funny
F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby --- The Rich Romantic Guy Who Can’t Just Move On
Ernest Hemingway, The Sun Also Rises --- Love Can Be So Frustrating
Ernest Hemingway, A Farewell to Arms --- War Can Be So Frustrating
Ernest Hemingway, The Old Man and the Sea --- Fishing Can Be So Frustrating
Margaret Mitchell, Gone With the Wind --- Something Blew Away
John Steinbeck, The Grapes of Wrath --- Your Trip to California: Things to Avoid
John Steinbeck, Tortilla Flat --- Chimichanga Flat
Dashiell Hammett, The Maltese Falcon --- The Maltese Pinata
Raymond Chandler, The Big Sleep --- The Big Crazy Plot That Ate My Brain
Raymond Chandler, Farewell, My Lovely --- Gotta Go, Sweets
Carson McCullers, The Heart Is a Lonely Hunter --- You've Got This Heart, and It's Like Lonely, and It's Like Hunting
J. D. Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye --- Your Weekend in New York: Phony Stuff to Avoid
Jack Kerouac, On the Road --- Are We There Yet?
Ken Kesey, One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest --- What to Do When Your Nurse Is Driving You Crazy
Harper Lee, To Kill a Mockingbird --- This Would Make a Great Movie If They Can Get Gregory Peck
Tags: Book titles
April 6th, 2010 at 11:34 am
The list brought a smile to my face and brightened my day!
April 6th, 2010 at 6:04 pm
Thank you, Kim! Isn't it amazing all the lists you can find on the Internet? And you can Google, or Topeka (my favorite new verb), anything. Toto, I don't think we're in Kansas anymore. What a world, what a world.
April 6th, 2010 at 8:54 pm
Wasn't the original title to The Wonderful Wizard of Oz supposed to be "All You Need Is Love...Brains, Heart, Courage and Home" or
"Things You Can Get in Exchange for a Broom".
Kudos to that diligent researcher (read 'comedic genius') on such a clever compilation.
I laughed heartily and was amused. Hopefully we'll see more *anonymous* lists like this pop up on HR. Oh the places we could go!
Thanks for sharing Michael.
April 7th, 2010 at 7:37 am
Misty-Lynn, I think you're absolutely correct about the Wizard of Oz titles. I'm glad you liked the list. We should probably include a warning that these titles can lead to trouble. In the Seinfeld episode, Elaine later repeats to her boss what Jerry told her about Tolstoy:
Lippman: You know, Tolstoy use to write in the village square. The faces inspired him.
Testikov: He didn't need any inspiration....God spoke through his pen.
Elaine: That is so true! Although one wonders if "War and Peace" would have been as highly acclaimed as it was if it had been published under its original name, "War---What Is It Good For?"
Lippman: What?
Elaine: Yes. Mr. Lippman. It was his mistress who insisted he call it "War and Peace." "War--What Is It Good For?" Absolutely
nothin'!
April 7th, 2010 at 7:44 am
Oops, I said heart/love twice didn't I? Oh well. I'm sure redundancy is a common problem in working titles, like...The Crop Farmer Who Planted Crops
That would be more interesting if it were:
The Crop Farmer Who Planted CROCS
He planted them in even rows, tails in the ground and noses up. It was perfect, except for the last one on the right, because the farmer couldn't tell which end of the croc was what! So it ended up face first in the dirt, and probably wouldn't grow right. It's name was Floyd and boy, could he tell you some funny stories!
April 7th, 2010 at 8:18 am
Good one (except that everyone knows that Crocs grow on trees).
Some people make lists of worst book titles. The winner of the Atlanta Journal-Constitution book blog’s "World’s Worst Book Title" contest is a 1995 book published by Mouse Works called "Cooking with Pooh."